Saturday 12 October 2013
Minions are Everywhere..... Have you seen Dave???: The journey begins....
Minions are Everywhere..... Have you seen Dave???: The journey begins....: After many months of researching, plotting and general evilness I finally managed to escape the tyranny of the banana factory... Once I g...
Tuesday 10 September 2013
Club Tonga, Ca'an Picafort - Mallorca
I travelled from the airport to Can Picafort on a coach. This coach took around 2 hours and dropped me off at my designated hotel for my stay.
Club Tonga
This hotel is very large.
One of the tallest buildings in the resort, (if not the tallest). A great base for the search of the banana...
What is this hotel like - I hear you ask???
It was OK as a base of operation and gave me an ideal hideaway to hatch my plans...
The Rooms - My room was small but extremely clean. One thing I will say for this hotel is that the cleaners do a fab job. This is probably the cleanest hotel I have ever stayed in!
One day, I returned to the room earlier than usual and can confirm that the cleaners even cleaned the ceiling fan on a daily basis which I thought was very impressive.
The beds were very comfy and the sheets were changed every day.
I asked the cleaner for an extra pillow and she brought one straight away.
The one downside to the rooms is that the walls are paper thin and you can hear everything that takes place on the whole floor of the hotel. Its most upsetting when you're suddenly awaken from dreaming of giant bananas...
My room was unfortunately on the "boring" side of the hotel and overlooked the car park, not the pool area.
The balcony was small but adequate for two people with a small table and two chairs.
I often sat at the table on the balcony enjoying a banana schnapps and watching the world go by...
The Lifts - Although not a problem for me as I was staying on 3rd floor and only used them twice on my whole stay (when I had my cases) ... A lot of the humans staying in the hotel were complaining about how slow they were and how long they had to wait for them. So if you are thinking of going here it could be a good idea to try to pre-book a room on a lower floor.
Pools - Club Tonga has two pools in roughly the same area.
The main pool is very deep and has a childs pool coming off it.
The other pool has a fountain in the middle as you can see in the picture, although throughout my stay the fountain wasnt switched on at all and we werent quite sure what the round thing in the middle was for! This pool had a sloping entry but was also very very cold as the sun never seemed to reach it during the day.
The gardens behind the pool are great if you want to sunbathe in a more private area.
Snacks - My travelling companion loved the snacks, especially the ham and cheese toasties. One snack bar served chips, pasta, toasties, pizza and there was a grill to the side which served hotdogs and burgers.
In my opinion the burgers were very cheap tasting so I did not have more than one during my stay.
Also, a word of warning, I did get served a hot dog that was severely undercooked (only once but meant Ichecked them each time afterwards).
Restaurant - The food in the restaurant was your typical 3* spanish hotel fayre. Usually one type of roast meat with varying veg. My only gripe here is that your wine is served in beakers rather than in a proper wine glass even though they did have wine glasses in view behind the bar. It was also quite hard to get served (staff often left the bar unattended and there is no waiter service whatsoever in the hotel)...
Drinks - while the alcohol available is OK generally. Its a bit of a let down that all drinks are served in very small plastic glasses. The only time you can get a drink in a proper glass is between 8pm and 10pm and only then if you go to the inside bar.
There are long queues in the bar, mainly because of the size of the glasses (see pic), the incompetence of the staff and due to the fact that they do not open up enough serving points at peak times. I never saw more than 3 open at any one time, even though there were around 6 signposted.
The strawberry vodka is lush! I have never had this before anywhere else and can attest that there are bottles available to purchase in the supermarket if you want to take some home. Couldn't find any banana vodka anywhere though!
Oh one other thing... The cocktails are all from machines and are NOT GOOD! I tried two of them and then gave up!
Staff - I have a theory that this is where all the staff that are jaded by Magalluf end up working. I struggled to see any that were under 40 and they were all as miserable as sin! I think the last time one of the staff smiled in this hotel was in 1962 and they were obviously sacked for it!
This is one area which seriously let this hotel down. I have never stayed in a hotel which was so lacking of atmosphere.
Shows - Be warned... All shows are put on by the in house entertainment staff and where they are energetic and try their best, it just wasn't for me.
The shows involving the audience were the most entertaining such as miss/mr Tonga, Men vs Women, etc.
All in all, this hotel is a good option if you do not want to spend a lot of money but do not fool yourself into thinking its a bargain. You get what you pay for!
The staff are the main failing in this hotel as they are generally unaccommodating, miserable and plain ignorant. The only person who was happy and pleasant to chat to was the cleaner!
I would also be dubious about booking a stay in peak season. This was September and the hotel seemed extremely busy and struggled to cope with the amount of visitors. I would hate to imagine staying in peak August!
Club Tonga
One of the tallest buildings in the resort, (if not the tallest). A great base for the search of the banana...
What is this hotel like - I hear you ask???
It was OK as a base of operation and gave me an ideal hideaway to hatch my plans...
The Rooms - My room was small but extremely clean. One thing I will say for this hotel is that the cleaners do a fab job. This is probably the cleanest hotel I have ever stayed in!
The beds were very comfy and the sheets were changed every day.
I asked the cleaner for an extra pillow and she brought one straight away.
The one downside to the rooms is that the walls are paper thin and you can hear everything that takes place on the whole floor of the hotel. Its most upsetting when you're suddenly awaken from dreaming of giant bananas...
My room was unfortunately on the "boring" side of the hotel and overlooked the car park, not the pool area.
I often sat at the table on the balcony enjoying a banana schnapps and watching the world go by...
The Lifts - Although not a problem for me as I was staying on 3rd floor and only used them twice on my whole stay (when I had my cases) ... A lot of the humans staying in the hotel were complaining about how slow they were and how long they had to wait for them. So if you are thinking of going here it could be a good idea to try to pre-book a room on a lower floor.
Pools - Club Tonga has two pools in roughly the same area.
The main pool is very deep and has a childs pool coming off it.
The other pool has a fountain in the middle as you can see in the picture, although throughout my stay the fountain wasnt switched on at all and we werent quite sure what the round thing in the middle was for! This pool had a sloping entry but was also very very cold as the sun never seemed to reach it during the day.
Snacks - My travelling companion loved the snacks, especially the ham and cheese toasties. One snack bar served chips, pasta, toasties, pizza and there was a grill to the side which served hotdogs and burgers.
In my opinion the burgers were very cheap tasting so I did not have more than one during my stay.
Also, a word of warning, I did get served a hot dog that was severely undercooked (only once but meant Ichecked them each time afterwards).
Restaurant - The food in the restaurant was your typical 3* spanish hotel fayre. Usually one type of roast meat with varying veg. My only gripe here is that your wine is served in beakers rather than in a proper wine glass even though they did have wine glasses in view behind the bar. It was also quite hard to get served (staff often left the bar unattended and there is no waiter service whatsoever in the hotel)...
Drinks - while the alcohol available is OK generally. Its a bit of a let down that all drinks are served in very small plastic glasses. The only time you can get a drink in a proper glass is between 8pm and 10pm and only then if you go to the inside bar.
The strawberry vodka is lush! I have never had this before anywhere else and can attest that there are bottles available to purchase in the supermarket if you want to take some home. Couldn't find any banana vodka anywhere though!
Oh one other thing... The cocktails are all from machines and are NOT GOOD! I tried two of them and then gave up!
Staff - I have a theory that this is where all the staff that are jaded by Magalluf end up working. I struggled to see any that were under 40 and they were all as miserable as sin! I think the last time one of the staff smiled in this hotel was in 1962 and they were obviously sacked for it!
This is one area which seriously let this hotel down. I have never stayed in a hotel which was so lacking of atmosphere.
Shows - Be warned... All shows are put on by the in house entertainment staff and where they are energetic and try their best, it just wasn't for me.
The shows involving the audience were the most entertaining such as miss/mr Tonga, Men vs Women, etc.
All in all, this hotel is a good option if you do not want to spend a lot of money but do not fool yourself into thinking its a bargain. You get what you pay for!
The staff are the main failing in this hotel as they are generally unaccommodating, miserable and plain ignorant. The only person who was happy and pleasant to chat to was the cleaner!
I would also be dubious about booking a stay in peak season. This was September and the hotel seemed extremely busy and struggled to cope with the amount of visitors. I would hate to imagine staying in peak August!
Flying Minions...
I boarded the plane with much excitement for my first flight...
Although this flight was only supposed to take 2 hours, it actually lasted 3 thanks to the French air traffic control going on strike!
We tried to strike at the banana factory once... Poor Kevin...
I had a nice window seat on the plane and was amazed to see us go up above the clouds...
I really do think I am one lucky minion to get this kind of a view.
While on the plane one of the very nice ladies brought me some food.
This was a breakfast meal and I do have to say although it didn't contain any bananas it was very tasty.
Although offered either a coffee or tea to wash the meal down, I declined preferring to stick to plain old water.
By the time I had settled myself down, watched a film on my ipad and had the meal above it was time for us to land.
The plane did have a bit of something called turbulance but it was only slight and just felt like when I am lying in bed and the other minions start jumping up and down on it.
They said this was due to wind... The only problem with wind I had experienced in the past was after Kevin discovered baked beans.... hehehehe - bottom!
This was my first airplane ride and have to say although we had extra time added due to the strike it was a very enjoyable experience.
I finally arrived at Palma airport in an excitable mood.... would I find romance, other minions or even bananas???
We are among you....
 |
| Thomas Cook flight from Bristol to Palma |
We tried to strike at the banana factory once... Poor Kevin...
 |
| He's not Kevin anymore... |
While on the plane one of the very nice ladies brought me some food.
This was a breakfast meal and I do have to say although it didn't contain any bananas it was very tasty.
Although offered either a coffee or tea to wash the meal down, I declined preferring to stick to plain old water.
By the time I had settled myself down, watched a film on my ipad and had the meal above it was time for us to land.
The plane did have a bit of something called turbulance but it was only slight and just felt like when I am lying in bed and the other minions start jumping up and down on it.
They said this was due to wind... The only problem with wind I had experienced in the past was after Kevin discovered baked beans.... hehehehe - bottom!
This was my first airplane ride and have to say although we had extra time added due to the strike it was a very enjoyable experience.
We are among you....
Flying Bananas....
I have discovered this great place where there are these amazing flying machines just waiting to take people to far away places...
Where better to begin my travels???
I wandered into Bristol Airport to begin my travels and searched the monitors for a place to visit...
I have never been on a airplane before so was nervous and excited about the flight...
Upon talking to a few of the humans, I came to the realisation that Spain was the best choice as the flight was a mere 2 hours. I decided to board the flight to Palma...
After purchasing my ticket, I was subjected to a bizarre ritual where I was made to remove my belt and walk through strange doorways which didn't lead anywhere!
I wandered round the shopping area for a while and stumbled upon a VIP lounge. As a valued henchman and founder member of banana club I considered this the right place for me to await my flight...
I settled into my seat, tried the bacon rolls that were on offer which were very nice...
I managed to recharge my phone and ipad while I waited thanks to the handy charging points right next to the seat.
One downside - although the bacon rolls are plentyful and very nice the usual snacks are not available until 10am.
I tried the coffee machine and the lattes were very nice.
Although disappointed by the lack of snacks... I did find a banana!
The fridges were well stocked with plenty of beer and mixers for the spirits available.
I did venture into the toilet to relieve myself and have to report that they are far from VIP standard! No handwash available, lack of toilet paper....
Have you seen a minion???
Do you have any photos???
We are among you!!!
Where better to begin my travels???
I wandered into Bristol Airport to begin my travels and searched the monitors for a place to visit...
I have never been on a airplane before so was nervous and excited about the flight...
Upon talking to a few of the humans, I came to the realisation that Spain was the best choice as the flight was a mere 2 hours. I decided to board the flight to Palma...
After purchasing my ticket, I was subjected to a bizarre ritual where I was made to remove my belt and walk through strange doorways which didn't lead anywhere!
I wandered round the shopping area for a while and stumbled upon a VIP lounge. As a valued henchman and founder member of banana club I considered this the right place for me to await my flight...
I settled into my seat, tried the bacon rolls that were on offer which were very nice...
I managed to recharge my phone and ipad while I waited thanks to the handy charging points right next to the seat.
One downside - although the bacon rolls are plentyful and very nice the usual snacks are not available until 10am.
I tried the coffee machine and the lattes were very nice.
Although disappointed by the lack of snacks... I did find a banana!
The fridges were well stocked with plenty of beer and mixers for the spirits available.
I did venture into the toilet to relieve myself and have to report that they are far from VIP standard! No handwash available, lack of toilet paper....
Have you seen a minion???
Do you have any photos???
We are among you!!!
Monday 9 September 2013
The journey begins....
After many months of researching, plotting and general evilness I finally managed to escape the tyranny of the banana factory...
Once I got out, I suddenly realised what a big world was out there waiting to be explored...
Everywhere I looked there was one sign that kept popping up everywhere so I thought that I'd investigate - "Starbucks"
I ventured into one of the strange buildings displaying the sign in Newport, Wales where I was able to purchase a large container of a brown liquid called a latte...
The nice assistant informed me that they did not have any banana flavoured syrup to add to my latte so I guess the search will just have to continue...
I settled into a charming seat and enjoyed my coffee while contemplating what to do next...
Have you seen any minions???
Do you have any photos of Minion activity???
We are among you...
Once I got out, I suddenly realised what a big world was out there waiting to be explored...
Everywhere I looked there was one sign that kept popping up everywhere so I thought that I'd investigate - "Starbucks"
I ventured into one of the strange buildings displaying the sign in Newport, Wales where I was able to purchase a large container of a brown liquid called a latte...
The nice assistant informed me that they did not have any banana flavoured syrup to add to my latte so I guess the search will just have to continue...
I settled into a charming seat and enjoyed my coffee while contemplating what to do next...
Have you seen any minions???
Do you have any photos of Minion activity???
We are among you...
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